Being Influential at Work
Influence is our inner ability to lift people up to our perspective.
--Joseph Wong
There are so many moments throughout a workday when we may find ourselves needing to be influential at work. Perhaps you are a manager and working with direct reports and want to influence performance. Or you are on a team and need to influence better outcomes for the project. Or perhaps you are simply trying to get your perspective across to a colleague to ensure your thoughts and ideas are heard in a meeting. Regardless of who you are trying to influence nor what you are wanting to be more influential about, there are some core considerations before having an influence conversation. The Accordence® approach to influence includes 3 perspectives for enhanced persuasion.
How to Approach the Influence Conversation: 3 Perspectives
Start with the Third Person Perspective and be an Observer. Step to the balcony as an outsider looking in. This allows you to get an overview from outside the conversation and notice the whole picture initially. It creates some objectivity to the situation by not wearing the hat of either party. When you take a step back to observe, consider:
If I were a witness to this situation, how would I describe what’s happening?
If there are tensions, how do I behave to reduce them?
How will I demonstrate fair treatment in this situation?
Move to the Second Person Perspective and be a Helper. Seek to understand the other party. This allows an opportunity to build trust and strengthen the relationship. Generally, people enjoy talking about themselves and may offer more information when feeling heard. Starting with the other party creates the potential for more openness and provides more data for the solutions later. When you listen to their story, consider:
What are the person’s perspectives and interests?
How can I show I understand the other person’s story?
How might I shift any dislike they have of me?
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The real beginning of influence comes as others sense you are being influenced by them ― when they feel understood by you ― that you have listened deeply and sincerely, and that you are open.
--Stephen R. Covey
Then, shift to the First Person Perspective and be a Promoter. Tell your story, what you see and what’s important to you. Talking last about yourself fosters more listening to you by the other party because they have already shared and they want to know now about your perspectives. When you share your thinking, consider:
What are my perspectives and my interests?
How can I share my story and needs in a constructive way?
How might I use experience, wisdom, assertiveness to have them understand me?
Once you consider, gather, and share this information through these three lenses, you now have sufficient input to generate options or possible solutions and ways to approach the issue.
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A person who causes you to react controls you. A person who compels you to think and consider doing differently influences you.
--Jeffrey Duarte
How to be Influential: 7 Principles
Robert Cialdini, an influence expert, shared seven key principles to be more influential based on psychology. When you include any of these principles in your approach, you increase the possibility of being more influential.
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With Reciprocity, people are motivated to reciprocate or return a favor. We feel a sense of obligation to give back for something given. In our minds, by reciprocating, we avoid seeming selfish and the potential social shame for not giving something back. In negotiations, this can aid in receiving concessions. Some examples include free samples spurring the purchase of something or saying no to an extreme request but yes to something more reasonable.
In our world of learning and development, when we offer a seat at a program for an observer from another division in the client company, it often spurs the introduction to another source of potential business.
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With Scarcity, people are motivated by the idea that they may lose something or miss an opportunity. This principle is fostered by our inner sense of perceived loss of freedom. Some examples are a limited run or number of a product available or a sale period or deadline.
In our work, we hold a facilitator for preferred dates for a certain amount of time and if they can’t confirm the program, they risk not having the person they requested on the date for which they asked.
With Consistency/Commitment people are motivated by a desire to be perceived as consistent with prior actions taken, decisions or commitments made. We exhibit personal and intellectual strength when we seem consistent with our commitments. Some examples include sales organizations creating a small sale first to create a customer instead of a prospect and then coming back with a larger ask or micro conversions like a download or email list subscription before marketing other items.
In our work, we ask for a signed written document as a form of confirmation and commitment to the work with us (a statement of work, letter of agreement, contract, PO) or offered a pilot before a larger audience commitment.
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With Likeability/Sympathy, people are motivated to agree and say yes more when we like the person with whom we are interacting. Likeability could come from broad areas such as attractiveness, similarity to us, compliments, familiarity, cooperation, or positive associations. Some examples are celebrity endorsements or pop culture connections when selling products or a friend’s recommendation.
When working with clients, using skill at relational rapport to create more comfort and build trust as well as practicing what one preaches are ways to demonstrate likeability. When we are collaborative and work to understand and meet client needs it fosters more interest in working with us.
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With Authority, people are motivated to go with the wishes of authority. We assume the authority has greater wisdom and control over rewards and punishment and so we defer to them more readily. Some examples are those with prestigious titles (professor, executive, etc.) create more behavior change and sell more effectively and those who follow authority figures act outside of their comfort zone.
In our work, we often make recommendations (or are asked for them) that are readily accepted on process, agenda, and content. because of our decades of experience in training.
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With Social Proof, people are motivated to act or think a certain way by knowing that many others are doing it or think that way. Some examples are advertising products as “largest-selling” or “fastest-growing…” and testimonials similar types of people.
At Accordence, we are influential through use of statistics such as 99.9% of all participants recommend our programs or sharing past clients as references.
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With Unity, people are motivated by being part of a group, wanting to belong and therefore acting like the group. Examples include rewarding ideas, participating in solutions, and using language such as “X number of people who want to enhance themselves, like you, have already purchased.”
In our line of business, we can jointly develop programs with our potential clients which creates more buy in as a co-created solution.
When you want to be more influential, consider the three perspectives and seven principles to guide you towards a more persuasive conversation.